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Smells like teen suckage. He really is just Soul Patrol Part II, anyway. Am I alone on that? Can you really picture his voice on the radio, any more than Taylor Hicks?

I’m not even slightly surprised that Casey Abrams was on the bottom. It’s Megan’s fault. Megan, if you recall, is the “friend” in the audience that Casey pointed out on Wednesday’s “American Idol” season 10 top 11 performance show.

Ever since Jennifer Lopez dubbed Casey “sexy,” girls have screamed for him.  They don’t want to think that the cuddly teddy bear is already taken. That takes a shine off fast. It’s like Andrea looking at Matt in a whole new light after he bonded with fellow prayer warrior Krista on “Survivor: Redemption Island”. (See recap below)

Other reasons he was at the bottom: He performed first and sometimes the early singers are forgotten by the end of the night. Also, after he performed he was grossly overpraised. Casual fans probably figured he was safe and they didn’t need to vote for him. People who don’t have clear favorites (like me) probably weren’t so impressed by that performance that they would jump to the phone/web.

I think Casey is cute and funny, but the growl got old for me last week. I like the talent this season, but I don’t have a strong favorite anymore. I’m voting performance-by-performance. Last night I voted for Jacob and Pia. It was the first (and possibly the only) time I voted for Jacob but I’ve voted for Pia several times. I like her.

Anyway, the judges saved Casey. Which means we still have a top 11. And all 11 will go on tour. What a Disney special. Two people go home next week. Such melodrama.

Interesting week. I have a lot of catching up to do, so I’m combing my “American Idol,” “Survivor” and “Top Model” recaps.

***

American Idol Season 10 (stream of consciousness asides)

Is it just me, or was the Marc Anthony opening extremely awkward? Did the “American Idol” top 11 want a thing to do with him? Was he just bored? That whole relationship is weird. Jennifer Lopez and Marc, I mean. But J.Lo and Steven Tyler is coming off as weird to me, too. Steven seems to turn his back to her sometimes and Jennifer openly leans into Randy Jackson. It’s like two against one.

By the way, happy birthday, Steven! He really is the most adorable thing to happen to this show since the Davids of Season 7.

Unnecessary side note: I still have my old, pink “About Me” diary from when I was in grade school where I wrote “Hulk Hogan” as the strongest person I knew. I didn’t quite get that it was supposed to be someone I knew in person.

Is Ryan Seacrest a slightly good actor or did Hulk actually hit him a little bit there? Did those people know they were going to get Julianne Hough-close to Ryan when he crashed into their row?

Stevie Wonder rocks. And I noticed Jennifer had her arm around Steven when Stevie sang for the b-day boy. Is she jealous of his attention? I’ve heard that, but who knows.

Catch up on my “American Idol” stories here.

They deserve the pink undies as punishment for being lazy. (CBS pic)

Survivor: Redemption Island

Who was it that ripped Grant Mattos’s shirt off during the immunity challenge on “Their Red-headed Step Child”? Was that David Murphy or Mike Chiesl? Whoever it was, THANK YOU.

I’ve been praying to the Survivor gods for more shots of hot Grant. And, as we know now, God has a vested interest in the outcome of the show. He’s Team Matt Elrod and Team Ometepe. Matt now has a pink Bible, courtesy of The Other Blonde, Krista Klumpp, but no girl wants to see her crush bonding with another (similar) woman, so Matt may have lost the very important support of Andrea Boehlke — aka the only girl on Ometepe who is not completely useless. (I miss you, Kristina Kell.) Matt has turned out to be more Brett Clouser than Jud “Fabio” Birza and it looks like Krista was briefly Matt’s Natalie White.

Anyway, I’m disappointed in my boy David. He was my pre-season pick to be named fan favorite. But what was that nonsense about defending Stephanie Valencia over Sarita White? Even if he didn’t know Sarita had the support of her loyal allies, didn’t he hear shrill Stephanie’s pro-Russell Hantz screeches earlier in the season? Doesn’t he know that it’s better to enter a merge with fewer numbers as long as they stick together, rather than a large group with some people ready to be bought by the other side? How do you think Russell got to the end on “Samoa”? That Foa Foa Foursome was far from a majority.

I hate to support Boston Rob any more than he’s already been supported, but right now — other than Matt — he’s the only player really making a mark. He even pulled a fast one on my new faux boyfriend (I don’t care that he’s married) Grant, switching out the idol clues last week. Rob is also right when it comes to letting Natalie Tenerelli and Ashley Underwood dig their own finale graves.

However, how pissed is Rob going to be if/when Rob gets booted before the two useless girls? That was Phillip Sheppard’s point and —  I hope these words never pass through my keyboard again — he’s right. I’m growing fond of our resident Coach 2.0. Is it inevitable that Phillip and Coach 1.0 will be brought back together and put on the same tribe?

At this point, I’m in the market for someone to support. I guess it’s Matt for now, but I might be Team Andrea, just to support a girl who feels illogically hurt and betrayed by a guy. Who hasn’t been there?

Catch up on my “Survivor” recaps and spoilers (such as they are) here in this archive.

I am currently Team Brittani, but ask me again next week. From left: Hannah, Molly, Dalya, Jaclyn, Brittani, Alexandria, Monique, Kasia and Mikaela (CW pic)

America’s Next Top Model Cycle 16

Am I nuts or is Alexandria Everett not really THAT annoying?

Maybe I’ve just been watching too much “Survivor” and “Project Runway.” And I haven’t really been watching enough ANTM this cycle to really weigh in, but at this point Alexandria just seems like one of those girls who sounds more abrasive than she means to. She’s my Sharon Stone out there.

But I think I’ve switched allegiances from the machete cheekbones of Mikaela Schipani to the cute bob of Brittani Kline. I also like Monique Weingart and I wonder who she reminds me of. Someone. And as sweet as she may be, I CAN’T STAND Jaclyn Poole’s voice. I can’t get past it. I think Kasia Pilewicz is already overrated. And Hannah Jones. Hannah is not making a dent at all for me.

The just-eliminated Dalya Morrow said it’s going to come down to bad-weave Molly and Brittani in the end. Agree?

Catch up on my ANTM stories in this archive.

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You had to know they would straighten Lauren Alaina's hair and give her the full Carrie Underwood makeover treatment.

To me, it’s obvious: The top 12 girls on “American Idol” Season 10 are far superior to the top 12 guys.

I think we should dump most of the guys and only keep:

I had to change the channel when most of these guys sang. It was too painful. So of course Steven Tyler and Jennifer Lopez adored them. The second J.Lo talks about a performance as "organic" my stomach wants to pull a Casey Abrams.

• Casey Abrams (one of my old high school buddies compared him to a Gorg on “Fraggle Rock” and I’m now fond of that idea)
The hilariously cheesy Scotty McCreery
Paul “Bradley Cooper” McDonald
Brett “Whip My Hair” Loewenstern and
Jacob Lusk — but Jacob only so he can prove he can indeed sing a contemporary song. He has a great voice but I can’t imagine hearing it on any modern radio station.

The girls killed it, with few exceptions.

Naima Adedapo shocked me with such a good version of “Summertime.” Yes, Fantasia owned “Summertime,” but not this version.

I loved Karen Rodriguez’s Spanish/English “Hero.” I really loved Thia Megia’s “Out Here On My Own.” I just voted online for Thia.

I wasn’t too into Lauren Alaina’s “Turn on the Radio” but that was partly because she was half-drowned out by the background singers. She is definitely getting the “American Idol” style makeover. I knew she would. She is part Kelly Clarkson and part Carrie Underwood. She’ll be fine.

Pia Toscano has a lot of buzz right now after “I’ll Stand By You,” but part of me wonders if that standing ovation was for her rehearsal performance, or some other version. She was good, but not great on the version we got to see. Besides, it’s never safe to peak too soon. Lauren is probably better off for taking it a bit slow.

I still think Lauren A., Scotty and Thia could take it to the end.

But I voted or Casey Abrams last night. So did my high school friend. He makes me smile. He is, as Jennifer Lopez put it, “sexy” in some weird, weird way. That’s probably the only thing she said that was worth hearing.

Funny how Randy Jackson is all-of-a-sudden the only judge actually doling out constructive criticism. How did that happen? Now he just needs to come up with critiques beyond “pitchy” and “sharp” … “dawg.”

Watch all of the performances in videos on Wetpaint’s “American Idol” page. It’s pretty cool.

Lauren, Scott and Thia. I think either Lauren or Scott will win. But what do I know.

There’s too much shouting going on. I miss Emily Anne Reed. She had a unique voice. She was my new Megan Joy Corkrey. And she’s gone.

Still around on “American Idol” Season 10 — the screamers. Like that James Durbin kid who is just a low-rent Adam Lambert. And the first girl on tonight’s Hollywood Week finale. She screeeeeaaaaamed her way through “God Bless the Child” as if the song were all vowels and no actual words.

The judges ate it up. They’re eating up all the screamers.

They don’t seem to realize most people on the radio are not screaming. A lot of them (*cough*Rihanna*cough*) can barely sing well enough to make it past the “Idol” auditions.

But when you hear their voices, you recognize them. That’s something I could say about Emily Anne Reed and Megan Joy Corkrey. But it’s not something I can say about 90 percent of the big-voice contestants on this show. They all sound the same.

Except for, say, Scott McCreery, the deep-voiced Southerner who cried over being a bully to poor Jaycee Badeaux and somehow added a lyric about jeans when screwing up “I Hope You Dance.”

(About Jaycee. He’s a sweetheart and I CAN’T STAND that guy in the glasses who made the decision to kick him out of the group song, but Jaycee probably made the top 40 out of sympathy.)

Go Casey! First time anyone used a stand-up bass during Hollywood Week.

I like Scott. I like red-headed Brett Loewenstern. I love Casey Abrams. But 15-year-old Lauren Alaina Suddeth is probably going to win. It couldn’t be more obvious that that’s what the judges want.

But, as we all know, “Idol” has been hijacked by 13-year-old girls, so unless they decide Lauren is cuter, or at least more relatable, than a guy like Scott, she may be cut before the end.

Same applies to cute little Thia Megia. But Thia’s voice isn’t that distinctive to me. Lauren could get to Carrie Underwood status, if she has the support.

Either way, I think this is the year a young’un wins. If David Archuleta were on Season 10, he’d win. But he’s not. So I’m going with either Lauren or Scott.

As long as it isn’t Ashley Sullivan. She’s kind of a local girl, but I’m sick of her emotional drama.

****UPDATE****

Check out the top 24 spoilers here. Actually, they just have 18 so far. I don’t see Thia! But I do see Jaycee…

**** END UPDATE****

American Idol Season 10 Top 40:

Alex Ryan
Brett Loewenstern
Casey Abrams
Chris Medina
Clint Jun Gamboa
Colton Dixon
DeAndre Brackensick
Jacee Badeaux
Jacob Lusk
James Durbin
Jerome Bell
Jimmie Allen
John Wayne Schulz
Jordan Dorsey
Jovany Barreto
Paul McDonald
Robbie Rosen
Scott McCreery
Stefano Langone
Tim Halperin
Tiwan Strong
Ashthon Jones
Brittany Mazur
Eryn Kelly
Haley Reinhart
Hollie Cavanagh
Jackie Wilson
Jessica Cunningham
Julie Zorrilla
Karen Rodriguez
Kendra Chantelle Campbell
Keisha Renee
Lauren Alaina Suddeth
Lauren Turner
Naima Adedapo
Pia Toscano
Ta-Tynisa Wilson
Thia Megia
Joey Dwyer-Mount
Rachel Zevita

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