She's not scrambling! No scrambling for Brenda. Not for eggs, not for votes, not for anything.

By Gina Carbone
opus619@gmail.com

Hey, how about that Holly Hobbie Hoffman? Nice power move tonight!

Reminds me of the “Survivor: Nicaragua” premiere when Holly cozied up to Wendy, then swiftly cut Wendy’s throat when the tide turned against her.

That’s a Survivor. Holly is a Survivor. Without being too obvious about it (unlike Jane Bright, who can’t stop showing off, even though it won’t help her get to the end.) Holly is a smart Survivor.

Jane betrayed Brenda pretty darn fast. Brenda could've dumped Jane last week but instead she voted for Marty. So what does Jane do? She listens to Holly and cuts Brenda's throat.

Holly told Jane there comes a time when you have to say “see ya,” even if the people are nice. That time came tonight.

So … see ya, Brenda Lowe!

This is Brenda’s own fault. She called herself the king of the island, with Matthew “Sash” Lenahan as her queen. Sash still has an idol. Brenda had no idol. No immunity. No protection beyond her own hot bod and even hotter ego. That kinda makes her seem like the jester. (Unless Jud “Fabio” Birza wants ownership of that title.)

Holly and Jane figured Brenda was calling the shots. Holly convinced Ben “Benry” Henry of the same.

Holly to Benry: “Kelly Purple crawls up Brenda’s ass.”

Nice visual!

Not that Benry was a tough sell, considering he was on the Marty-led alliance.

I especially appreciated the awesome moment between NaOnka Mixon and Jane where Jane started tripping down the high road, telling NaOnka she doesn’t like to associate herself with villains. And Brenda is a villain. Irony alert!

Chase was on the fence again. The name of the episode was “Stuck in the Middle” and that’s Chase, but also Brenda and Sash themselves. Their power position was as the swing votes, but that also left them dispensable and untrustworthy.

REWARD CHALLENGE

Chase did a dang good job leading the team of Chase, Fabio, NaOnka, Kelly and Jane. Their reward was pizza, brownies and volcano surfing.

I so wanna go volcano surfing.

So that’s two rewards in a row for Fabio. He was with the men-minus-Chase on the BBQ last week.

NaOnka pulled Fabio aside and they had a “for real, for real” conversation on the volcano. These two hate each other and supposedly Na is Brenda’s best island friend, but now Na is approaching Fabio about dumping Brenda. So much for loyalty!

This plan just fell right into Fabio’s hands. He and Benry were on the chopping block, so if everyone hands him Brenda, bonus! He wants to stay lying low so he can slither along in this game. (Is he a Slytherin? I had him pegged as Hufflepuff.)

I’m telling you, Fabio is being handed this game on a silver platter.

THE ROOF, THE ROOF, THE ROOF IS ON FIYAH

Meanwhile, back at camp … a shitestorm was in play!

Because rain was coming, the tribe had moved the chests around the fire to protect the fire from the rain. But there was nothing to protect the chests and the rest of the camp from the fire.

Oops.

There goes the flour. And mangoes. And the machetes. No rocket scientists on this crew, that’s for sure.

How do you think the camera crew feels about situations like this? They have to stand there and film it. No tipping off the castaways.

Benry, Brenda, Holly, Sash and Dan came back from a lost reward challenge to find the camp almost totally burnt down.

This reminds me of that time on “Survivor: Australia” when the river washed away camp and almost stole their rice jar, but Tina and Keith managed to save it. Then Colby came back from his reward and there was definite resentment going on.

CHASE TELLS BRENDA THE PLAN

Oh Chase. Loyal and honest to a fault. He told Brenda Holly’s plan to get rid of her. “For whatever reason I trust Brenda.” There’s no “reason or rhyme,” he said. But there is: She’s hot.

Brenda wasn’t impressed by their plan.

Then Chase told NaOnka that he told Brenda about his plan. Chase really is “scatterbrained.” Love the guy, but he’s not playing a smart game.

NaOnka told Benry she wanted Brenda out, then Sash out, then Chase out. Music to Benry’s ears, since the order up to this point seemed to be Benry, then Fabio, then Dan.

Benry said Chase has been playing with his heart this whole time. That’s sweet in the real world, but not here.

Jane: “Chase is suckin’ up to Brenda like he wants to get in her pants or somethin’. I have no idea what kind of magic spell she’s casting over Chase right now.”

Again: SHE’S HOT. That’s the magic spell.

However, Chase already made an alliance with Brenda.That was after making an alliance with Shannon, who is now gone. Then Chase made an alliance with Jane and the other women.

But Chase’s #1 alliance is clearly with Little Chase, who is charge of his decisions.

IMMUNITY CHALLENGE

Rope challenge. Sash was out first. Sash is so skinny he could hide in one of the chests and no one would find him until the finale.

Purple Kelly (why are we all still calling her that?) was out next. Then Holly. Then Brenda. Then Dan. (Even Dan outlasted Brenda!) Then Fabio, who just released, since he was never in danger. Smart! NaOnka was out next. Benry looked constipated.

It was down to Benry, Jane and Chase. Not sure why Benry was growling, but since he was a “Girls Gone Wild” cameraman and supposedly dated Heidi Montag, I shouldn’t be surprised by anything he does. He was out next.

It came down to Chase and Jane. Chase said he was secure. Jane said she was going to let go. Jeff talked her out of it, if she ever really meant it.

Jane won immunity. Jane is a badass, but she just put a huge target on her back. She was not on the chopping block tonight, but she’s a showoff. She did the same thing a few weeks ago when she fought Fabio for the immunity win she already had.

WHO IS GOING HOME?

Chase talked to Sash about wanting to get rid of Benry. NaOnka and Sash talked about how much Chase annoys them. They can’t stand Chase. What am I missing? From where I’m sitting, NaOnka is the annoying one.

NaOnka told Sash they want to get rid of Brenda. It was the first he heard of it.

Chase and Holly talked to Fabio about what to do. Fabio said he didn’t know what to do, he’s been sitting back. He lets Holly make her pitch.

Chase said he doesn’t trust Benry, Holly, Dan or NaOnka. He doesn’t mention Fabio or Sash.

Chase talked to Brenda and said Na is the one who had the idea to dump Brenda. Brenda said Na would never vote for her.

Interesting that Chase doesn’t mention that it was Holly’s idea. Unless there was an editing fail, this is Holly’s doing.

Sash and Chase talked to Brenda about NaOnka’s plan, which I don’t think was NaOnka’s plan.

Brenda said Sash could use the idol and blindside them. So he considered using it to save her.

Brenda was furious. She thought she had a great plan to take NaOnka to the end. (Which is a great plan for everyone but NaOnka, who has to know by now that no one would vote for her.)

Brenda was hoping Sash would use the idol to save her and blindside NaOnka. Not a chance.

TRIBAL COUNCIL

Sash told Jeff there’s been a reshuffling. Brenda said she never wanted to vote off Marty. Brenda said she’s never had difficulty trusting people, but now there’s a break in the alliance due to NaOnka.

NaOnka said “I don’t think it was me…” Jeff cut her off before she could finish the thought. She went on to say Chase was running around with his head cut off.

Chase said he did go to Brenda because he trusted her. Purple Kelly weighed in “with 20 years of wisdom.” She felt out of the loop for the first time. (Is she even in this game?)

NO ONE MENTIONS HOLLY. Love it! Holly may be my new favorite.

Jeff asked Brenda if she scrambled at all. She said she did little things. She’s too proud for the word “scrambling.” It’s beneath her. Eye rolls all around!

Holly holds up her “Brenda” vote: “You should’ve scrambled.”

Yes.

1st vote: Brenda

2. NaOnka

3. Benry

4. Brenda

5. Brenda

6. Brenda

7. Brenda

Sash never gave Brenda the idol, but it looks like he did vote for her. So did Chase. Kelly Purple gave the Benry vote. So Sash gets out of this with his idol intact, but not his power position. Still, Brenda shouldn’t feel like this is a betrayal by Sash. He never owed her an idol and the majority was already going in her direction. Chase, on the other hand, did a lot of talking for nothing. And Kelly Purple/Purple Kelly is clueless.

THESE PEOPLE ARE STILL AROUND

Ben “Benry” Henry, 24; bar owner
Chase Rice, 24; NASCAR jackman/singer
Judson “Fabio” Birza, 21; student/model/musician
Kelly Shinn, 20; student
Matthew “Sash” Lenahan, 30; luxury broker
NaOnka Mixon, 27; P.E. teacher
Dan Lembo, 63; property management
Holly Hoffman, 44; swim coach
Jane Bright, 56; dog trainer

***

Catch up on my “Survivor” recaps and spoilers here.

Advertisements