Moral of the story: Stop letting Heidi Klum be the client on “Project Runway.”
Never let her bring the runway drama into the workroom. It produces the emotional equivalent of fingernails on a chalkboard, a car horn going off and a baby crying in the upstairs apartment — all combined. It’s just not good.
On Season 8 Episode 11, “A Look in the Line,” Mondo went Gretchen. Gretchen went Gretchen. Ivy went Gretchen + Satan.
Even Gretchen’s model went AWOL. She got off lucky. (Although I am sorry about her family emergency.)
No one knew how to create designs — three! — for Heidi Klum’s collection. You know why? Because it’s Heidi’s collection, not theirs. Why were they even asked to do this for her? Where are their own voices as designers? Her stuff was very bland and scaled back and inspired exactly no one.
Never has fabric so blah produced such passionate responses — although the passion was all negative and most of it had nothing to do with the garments.
I loved Andy South’s looks, but wasn’t too thrilled about anyone else’s.
I have no idea why Mondo Guerra was in the top again. Or April Johnston, who did dark, drab stuff again.
I’m not even slightly surprised to see the back of sweet Christopher Collins — who was probably going to go home anyway, but certainly after he chose Ivy Higa as his partner.
She is the kiss of death, you know. Karma came for her and took Christopher down too. His three designs were sad face garments. No smiley faces.
No wonder they decided to bring back all the people who hated poor Michael Costello. The garments were destined to be dull, so they had to find an alternate source of interest.
So they accused him of cheating. Ivy spoke the words, but she was congratulated for it. She “took one for the team.” She’s the martyr.
*** THE CHEATING SCANDAL/ AKA TAPE-GATE ***
What brought all this on? Ivy, of course. The new designers were in the sewing room and Ivy was sitting behind Michael C.
Ivy asked how he felt about still being there.
He said he was in shock.
Ivy: “Why, because you cheated?”
He said no. She said they saw the dress he cheated on. It was the Jackie Kennedy challenge. They said the blue dress was taped on so it wouldn’t fall off his model. He said his model used sticky boobs. (To be fair, that Episode 8 challenge was doomed from the start.)
She kept pushing, the way she does, and he said she’s been a bitch to him all season. He swore. Ivy said his low-class language showed what a “despicable” person he is.
Michael said he’s there for a reason. Ivy: “Because you played the game. You talked shit about people and you sabotaged people and that’s why you’re here.”
That sounds like trash talk and low-class language to me. When MC leaves, Ivy says “Satan has left the room.”
AJ talked to Michael and said people do think he cheated. MC said if he didn’t have Mondo as a friend he would’ve thrown in the towel.
April congratulated Ivy on calling MC out. Ivy also gloated to Valerie about it.
Ivy: “I think Michael C. deserves to be disqualified. The world will give him what he deserves. I definitely believe in karma.”
Right after that we see her get poked in the eye. MC laughed.
At that point, Tim Gunn came into the workroom. “Designers, I hear that there is an accusation about cheating. Is that true?”
Michael C. said yes. Ivy said the girls saw a bunch of topstick in the bathroom, during the Jackie O challenge. Ivy saw it and Gretchen raised her hand to indicate that she saw it as well.
Ivy said they didn’t say anything that night, but they brought it to producers’ attention the next day and they told her it was too late.
Tim said it was too late. The judges saw nothing on the runway, Tim saw nothing in the workroom and the many cameras caught nothing.
As far as Tim is concerned it was “a case of a non-case.”
To me, it was really just a case of Ivy trying to damage Michael C.’s reputation and instead damaging her own.
But why are we as viewers seeing this now? Why did Tim get involved at this point? Why didn’t we see this the day Ivy and company approached the producers? I’ll be interested to hear Tim explain this in his Episode 11 vlog.
*** ON THE RUNWAY ***
The rest of the show continued as if Tape-gate had not just happened.
Here are the pairs of remaining designers and returning designers:
Mondo – Valerie
Gretchen – Casanova
Christopher – Ivy
Michael C. – A.J.
April – Peach
Andy – Michael D.
Gretchen: I like her separates, especially the slashed top on the third look. The color palette is bland, but that’s what we’re stuck with. Bland. Judges: Lower scores. Heidi Klum said she had the same problems with this that she had with Michael C’s outfits. It’s too “hoshkaposh,” aka “hodgepodge.” Nina Garcia said it looked very forced. She has weird transparent Spanx showing. Her styling does not help her.
By the way, Heidi and Gretchen did not connect well in the workroom. Heidi didn’t like Gretchen’s fabric choice and after getting defensive, Gretchen said if the fabric was a major concern, it was out. She then threw it across the room.
April said Gretchen was coming on too strong because she can’t take criticism. April — who has otherwise turned into Gretchen’s new #1 Toadie — said Gretchen can be demanding and disrespectful without realizing it. True!
On the runway, before calling her “safe,” Heidi gave Gretchen some advice: “Constructive criticism is not your enemy.” Gretchen: “Heidi really doesn’t like me.”
Andy: Very sportswear. Very Andy. Love the hoodie in the second look. LOVE the third dress. Very cute. Judges: Higher scores. Heidi Klum likes his looks a lot. Michael Kors called them super-wearable. He likes the variety but it’s also singular. Nina Garcia likes the lightness of it. She thinks it could look a little Halloween, but each piece is good on its own.
April: Dark and drab. This is what April does, I guess. I’m not seeing anything new from her. The third look seems like 80 percent curtains. Judges:Higher scores. Michael Kors loved the asymmetry on the first dress. It’s not athletic, but it’s sophisticated. Heidi liked the looks. Her least favorite is the little shorts.
Christopher: One snore after another. This is not fashion. Sorry. Love Christopher, but this went wrong. I do kind of like the third look, though. It’s a shapeless dress, but… no, I guess I don’t like it. Judges:Lower scores. Michael Kors said the clothes look so cheap. He doesn’t see anything anyone would pay more than $10 for. The dress is a “sad face” dress, not a smiley face. Nina hates the proportion with the pants. MK said “You tortured it. You beat that with a rock.”
Michael C.: I like the first jacket. I don’t care about pumpkin spice; I love orange. Love the second jacket too. The third look is really simple and sexy. Very low belt. Not sure about the belt. Judges: Lower scores. Michael Kors said just because it’s oversized doesn’t make it easy and relaxed. He tried to make it look “fancy” and lost the easiness. Nina Garcia didn’t like the styling and unnecessary accessorizing. It doesn’t look relaxed. They don’t care for the color. MK says so much of it is how you put it together.
Mondo: Look, I never quite get Mondo’s stuff so it’s no surprise to me that I don’t like it. Having said that, I don’t mind the third look. It’s mostly a hospital smock, but for Mondo it’s scaled back. Judges: Higher scores. Michael Kors loved the kooky headbands. He thinks the clothes have some whimsy. Mondo lost him on the waist down. “I think there are so many interesting things you can do on bottom.” Well! Nina Garcia liked the athletic/satin combo. She loved the middle look. Heid Klum thought he did a fantastic job. Ugh.
By the way, Heidi and Mondo fought in the workroom too — even more than Gretchen and Heidi. Mondo got bored and above-it-all with Heidi when she questioned his look and couldn’t fit into it when she tried it on.
Mondo: “Maybe I’ll dress my dog in it when I get home.”
Heidi: “There’s no reason for you to be rude.”
Mondo: “I’m not being rude.”
But he was being rude, in his words, in his expressions, in his attitude. Actually, Gretchen and Mondo both have major “I’m an artist” ego issues. Mondo is still a sweetie, but he’s no saint.
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