Jason & Landon. You know, I'm fond of both. I've forgiven Jason. Mostly because I'm sick of Melissa Rycroft.

By Gina Carbone
opus619@gmail.com

I was watching Team USA in The World Cup and something kept nagging at me. I couldn’t figure it out until I realized USA bigshot Landon Donovan kept reminding me of “The Bachelor” basketcase Jason Mesnick. Formerly known as The Most Hated Bachelor In History.

(I’m not sure if Wes Hayden replaced him on “The Bachelorette” but I’m pretty sure Justin “Rated-R” Rego and Frank “I Love My Girlfriend” Neuschaefer are going to put Jason deep on the list.)

Jason actually has a nice body. Not Jesse Beck or Kiptyn Locke nice. But nice.

Landon is an amazing player and seems like a decent guy, but man is he boring. His voice, the diplomatic answers. He really is the soccer version of Jason. I loved his ESPN SportsCenter ad, mostly because it hints to a personality you rarely see elsewhere.

He’s intense. I get it. When they played the National Anthem today in the (sob) match against Ghana, the rest of the USA team seemed to be singing along or looking, you know, normal. Landon had this intense, focused look. Serial killer focused.

Whatever gets the job done. Except this time the job did not get done. In extra time Ghana won. I’m sad. Especially since I’m curious about this Bianca situation. Apparently Landon was married to some tall “Rules of Engagement” actress named Bianca Kajlich and although they are separated, he gave her a

Landon is Captain America right now.

shoutout at the end of the match against Algeria, in which he scored the winning goal. I just like drama, so I’ll miss hearing about that.

Jason, for the record, you were right. Melissa just wanted fame. You seem happy with Molly and, more important, you’re staying out of the public eye. For that, I salute you with a vuvuzela honk.

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